"Is Butter a Carb?"

Today's lesson:

"When lending out DVDs or books [or clothing for that matter], make yourself a list of what's gone out IN THE EVENT THAT IT NEVER COMES BACK."

I lent a friend a pile of DVDs and books approximately over a year ago. It took over 6 months to get 4 of the books back. I was overly gracious and overly confident - at the time - and didn't bother writing down what was lent. BIG MISTAKE.

I don't even know what's missing anymore. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (book, not DVD) never came back, but the other 3 books in the series did. Thirteen (movie featuring Evan Rachel Wood and Nikki Reed - fantastic) is missing from my collection, but Summer Sisters, the BEST Judy Blume book since Forever... came back in one piece.

But really, those are the only things I can identify.

Why is this even a problem? I keep taking trips to Wal-Mart (like I will be later this afternoon) and I always saunter by the cheapie DVD racks, DYING to look through. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M MISSING AND WHAT TO REPLACE.

I have the most obnoxious DVD collection ever. It's 99% BAD girlie movies from the 80s-90s.
[Sidenote: I just glanced at the shelves - I am also missing Say Anything - John Cusack at his finest.] Ugh. It drives me bonkers that I just don't know what's missing.

So, today's lesson: WRITE THINGS DOWN. KEEP INVENTORY. Why? Because when you lose touch with the person who has your treasured books/DVDs, you're going to want to replace them. Stat.

"But THAT Should TOTALLY Work"

Due to a lack of French Vanilla coffee pods in my kitchen, and the fact that regular coffee sends me to the bathroom faster than a McDonald's cheeseburger, I put a splash of chocolate milk in my afternoon coffee.

Yes, in addition to both regular milk AND sugar.

Result?

Delicious central.

Secondary result?

Bathroom expedition took approximately 50% less time than a usual coffee.


AWESOME!!!

Things That Are Annoying

1. Out of the 4 courses I am taking this semester, only one has a final exam. It's NOT annoying that I only have one exam and that I wish I had more - my one exam takes place on December 23rd, at 2 p.m., a.k.a. the last possible day for exams, or, I do not get to possibly go on vacation (or enter hibernation) until the last possible day.
2. My top-notch cute as a button awesome -and only- black leather jacket has mysteriously grown a slight tear on its sleeve. How that got there, BEATS ME. What am I going to do about it? Fix it. How? Let's not go there. It's going to be a long documented trial. Any ideas?

I Know How I Feel About Fakes...

But really, I'm willing to cave.

We all saw the SATC movie. We all fell in love with Manolo Blahnik's "Something Blue". With a price tag of $945 USD, I cannot rationalize that purchase EVER. I'd sell all my purses in exchange for these. Forget that they were featured in the movie - I couldn't care less. It's that cobalt blue satin color that reeled me in. The classic shape. The TO-DIE-FOR jeweled buckle.

$945 is still WAY over budget, especially when shoe budget is between $5 and $25 these days. NOT MUCH I CAN BUY WITH THAT.

And, despite being fervently morally opposed to anything NOT real, I came across these guys and have signed up for an email notification for when my size will be available. IF EVER.

These are the real Something Blues:Excuse me while I mop up my drool puddle.

And these self-loathing Martinez Valero "Zenith" pumps are the knock-offs:

At $159.99 USD, these guys aren't such a bargoon either, but I'm plenty positive that blowing 2 bills on shoes is SLIGHTLY more reasonable than blowing close to 10 bills on the real ones.


Now, before ANYONE jumps down my throat for promoting fakes, let's play a round of clarifications:

• I am NOT suggesting anyone purchase shoes from those "cheap" Louboutin/Manolo sites - those are fully fake and for LOSERS.
• These pumps are really seasonal and trendy. By the time the next SATC movie comes out, there'll be a new Manolo endorsement.
• I own ONE pair of actual Manolos, so DON'T JUDGE ME for wanting these.
• Nobody should pay full price for things featured in a movie.

And speaking of shoesies, I ventured into Aldo for the first time in ages [lies, I bought awesome MBMJ-inspired lace-up booties over the summer] and they have AWESOME shoes in. Like even better for seasonal trends than Steve Madden, when we all know that SM knocks off EVERY designer shoe on the planet. Aldo, while they knock off EVERYTHING too - for some odd reason - seems to have hit the fall shoe nail on the head with great shoes. I was heavily impressed.

http://www.aldoshoes.com/ca-eng/women/boots/tall-boots/75426698-velardi/97 those guys? AWESOME. Over the knee AND heeled AND platformed. Delicious. You can just call me Vivian.

http://www.aldoshoes.com/ca-eng/women/pumps/almond-toe/76343755-fawson/12 the grey and taupe are suede. I used all my self-restraint and didn't even TRY these on, for fear I'd leave with them. Too yummy!!!

Of course, since shoesies that are YUMMY and cute and exciting aren't in this week's budget, I settled my shopping craving at Old Navy. With this dress. At $20 CAD + tax, I couldn't resist. I grabbed it in the grey/black combo. Adorable central!!! Now if I only had some beautifully fabulous thigh-high boots to go with it...

Group Projects - Revisited

This semester marks my beautiful return to school. Not that I haven't been taking classes now for a good 2 years, but I am now taking more than 2 a semester.

Two of my four classes INSIST on multiple group projects. I am really just not the biggest group-project fan. I've had more than one terrible experience, including one where 3 of my 4 group members ABANDONNED THE CLASS without any warning, leaving my 5-man group a duo. I've had to write reports on group members who were completely uncooperative. I've had group members use BABELFISH to translate their work.

The upside - that may also be a downside - is that all of my groups are premade by my professors. Which can be amazing, because if the group is crap, I can bark at my professor with reason. It's particularly awesome in the class that I don't know anyone in. No last-one-chosen-for-the-team for me!

Which brings me to this...

In this particular class, where I have no friends - YET - we have a presentation tonight that was assigned last week. It's a "quick & dirty" presentation, as my professor so willingly dubbed it, and it's worth no more than 5% of my final grade. Totally don't care.

We were split into groups, and my group has 6 other members, making us a petite group of SEVEN PEOPLE. It actually worked out pretty fantastic - everyone volunteered for specific tasks. I am presenting, obviously.

Because we had a week to prepare for this, we all agreed that we would not meet in person (7 people to coordinate is a pain. Even organizing 4 people is tough), and we'd just correspond via email. Sounds normal and fair, right?

WRONG-O.

My group has been sending emails galore. I have responded to a bunch, with QUESTIONS of my own. NOBODY ACKNOWLEDGES MY EMAILS OR ANSWERS THEM.

Prime example:

Since I am presenting, and doing not much else, I've offered at least 5 times to make a Power Point presentation.
"Would anyone like me to make a power point?"
"Do you think we need a power point?"
"Is someone making a power point presentation?"
"Should I make some mock-up slides to work with?"
"CAN SOMEONE ANSWER ME SO I CAN POSSIBLY DO SOMETHING?"

Last night, in one of the group emails, one girl had the NERVE to write
"Also is anyone putting together any audio visual material together?"

To which I threw my laptop across the room, shrieked, and then casually responded, TODAY, that I have no problem making slides, BUT TO PLEASE INFORM ME BY NOON SO I CAN ACTUALLY DO IT.

Nobody has responded yet. It's like I JUST DON'T EXIST.

Meanwhile, it seems like I'll be spending my day brushing up on E. Cora Hind's personal life & biography, so at least I won't look like a total douchebag when I have to present tonight.

And on ANOTHER Note...

On a completely other note, non-blog/spam/anger related, I am taking my first major step in the art of not-shopping and saving money.

Okay, fine, my SECOND step. Step 1 was to unsubscribe from online sample sale website email notifications. Thanks, RueLaLa, but I don't need to see all the yummy things for sale THAT I CAN'T HAVE NOT ONLY BECAUSE I AM POORSVILLE, BUT BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO SHIP TO THE COUNTRY NORTH OF YOUR BORDER. Hautelook asked me to write a paragraph on why I don't want their emails anymore. I wrote something to the effect of "I am trying to stop spending money and I want to avoid temptation AND YOUR STUFF IS PRETTY PRICEY ANYWAYS." I'm pretty sure Gilt Group(e?) purposefully made their unsubscribing thingy crappy so I can't actually stop getting their emails. Revolve newsletters pissed me off from the beginning because UNLIKE shopbop, they do NOT have coupon codes often or FUN promotions. THAT is why shopbop still gets my email-love. Beyond the Rack also gets to stay because they're from Montreal. And I've had 3 successful orders from them. Which I shall not mention... CHEAP JBRAND JEANS AND CHEAP MIMI AND COCO TOPS AND CHEAP ED HARDY SCARVES. Whoops...

Right - back on track...

Step two is returning over-priced items to Urban Outfitters that A. don't fit so well [see ill-fitting skirt, exhibit A] and B. are pretty, but really useless considering the style [see fancy printed top that I really don't want to return because it's so pretty and stylish and trendy but I am going to return it because I am a really good girl who needs to save her pennies, exhibit B].

You know what, Urban Outfitters? YOU ARE VERY OVERPRICED FOR WHAT YOU ARE SELLING.

Thankfully, my F21 experience was so MIZ, that I won't even be REMOTELY tempted to take my return $$$ and head over to blow it on CRAP. No, I'll just put it in the bank and then open up my computer and ORDER THE 3 CARDIGANS FROM F21 ONLINE.

Maybe.

Spam Commenting = THORN. IN. MY. SIDE.

I get a TON of spam comments on my other blog - http://www.craftwithjackie.com . Like not your average run-of-the-mill spam. I just moderated through 60+ comments - 3-5 were approved. 60 were SPAM. So, what's included in the spam category?

Russian PORNOGRAPHY links.

Russian COMMENTS.

Casino/gambling websites.

"Prescription" drug links.

And, my favorite, a SPAM CONVERSATION, which, of course, I shall transcribe for everyone's reading pleasure. These guys were all supposed to be comments on the SAME POST. [Note that at first glance, some can KIND OF be mistaken for real comments - until you realize that the signature on each one is a SPAM LINK. That, and they all come from the same IP address. See? NOT SO STUPID AFTER ALL.]

Submitted on 2009/09/14 at 5:09am
Despite…

Submitted on 2009/09/14 at 9:04am
Here you are!

Submitted on 2009/09/14 at 12:53pm
Frankly speaking

Submitted on 2009/09/14 at 4:35pm
Vice versa.

Submitted on 2009/09/14 at 8:14pm
I am ever so sorry!

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 12:47am
Let me see…

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 4:18am
It`s OK!

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 7:53am
I am ever so sorry!

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 11:40am
OK.

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 3:37pm
Well

Submitted on 2009/09/15 at 8:44pm
Have a good weekend!

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 2:10am
You are welcome!

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 5:42am
In half an hour in two days,

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 9:43am
Hopefully…

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 2:15pm
Oh, what weather!

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 6:16pm
Can I have a hug?

Submitted on 2009/09/16 at 11:30pm
Is this the way to the library?

Submitted on 2009/09/17 at 6:17am
The point is that…

Submitted on 2009/09/17 at 1:42pm
Can you tell me …, please

I get comment notification emails - obviously - and before I cleverly figured out it was spam galore, I was confused as heck. I couldn't understand for the LIFE OF ME why people were leaving weirdo comments, and worse, WHY SOMEONE ELSE WAS SAYING "THANK YOU" FOR ME. I GET TO SAY "THANK-YOU".

On that note, I DO like comments.

JUST NOT ONES THAT ARE STUPID AND POSSIBLY SPAM-RELATED.

Forever 21 Opens In Town - WHOOPIE DOO

I've only been buzzing about this for MINIMUM ONE YEAR.

The opening came and went two weeks ago, and, in an effort to avoid mobs of 14 year old girls in skinny jeans and heavy eyeliner, I waited until today to make my visit.

Umm, two words: DISAPPOINTMENT and SNORE.

I made the mistake of really REALLY hyping myself up. I scoured the Canadian website [FYI: we Canadians don't get even CLOSE to all the fab stock the U.S. gets, see our website for proof] and made myself like 7 mock-up shopping carts of items I wanted to find and possibly try on/buy. I was reasonable - 3 cardigans, 1 skirt, 1 jumper, a belt and 2 head-accessories. It didn't even cross my mind once that I MAY need a back-up plan - I was looking ideally for some new Jew-Holiday outfits AND some fun wardrobe "essentials". Let's talk about how it was.

Here's the good: I took my sister on a fantastic bonding afternoon of chaotic shopping. Forever 21 has 2 floors of clothes. The upstairs has "fancy" clothes - i.e. the trashy party dresses, endless tutu-style miniskirts, sequins galore. The main floor has everything else. Tons of twelve-by-twelve. Piles of jewelry.

Here's the bad: ON AN EARLY FRIDAY AFTERNOON, WHEN KIDS SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL, THE STORE WAS MOBBED BY TEENAGE "HIPSTERS". Not a single item from my "wish list" was found. 7492 different styles of PLAID SHIRTS [FYI - I am not so into that whole look, yet]. Twelve-by-twelve was TAPPED OUT. Sizes? TAPPED OUT. Jewelry? TAPPED OUT. Belts? LIKE 4 STYLES TOTAL. Oh, did I mention about 50 different varieties of LEGGINGS? 2 FULL sections of THIS loser dress IN EVERY COLOR [it's okay for summer time, and I get its purpose, but it's September and it's already chilly and this dress was STILL FULL PRICE]. Packed dressing rooms. Oh, and NOTHING FROM MY WISH LIST. NOT EVEN THE BELT.

What did I actually end up getting?
This stupid headband, when I really wanted this one.
This necklace - which is admittedly pretty fun, who doesn't love feathers?
A necklace I can't find on either website - faux pearls with big metal flower things - it's cute.
And a huge colorful jeweled cuff bracelet that hurts to put on and hurts to take off... when I really wanted this one.

While I was waiting in line to pay, there were two MAYBE 18 year old French-Canadian girls behind me yapping about getting wasted all weekend. SNORE. Funny part was that they kept making fun of bib necklaces and calling them UGLY and HORRIBLE. IRONY - THOSE ARE SO TRENDY AND HOT AND COOL for fall. Those two morons will be wearing the Urban Behavior knockoffs next fall. They were also saying how once the hype dies down, F21 will be empty. Yeah, right. F21 is NEVER empty.

It was a GIGANTIC disappointment. I'm not even posting links of the things I WANTED that I could not find. Too sad.

Truthfully, one of the surprisingly friendly workers (most were obnoxious and ignored me) told me new stock comes in Mondays/Tuesdays. She also told me that ordering online is a breeze and it comes in 2-3 days. SHOULD'VE TOLD ME THAT LAST WEEK.

As soon as I'm a little more flush (Beyond The Rack.com owns my soul right now), I will probably order those cardigans... along with everything else I missed!!!

Over-Enthusiastic Salesgirl = TRAUMA

OR
Why I am cautiously avoiding the ONLY Betsey Johnson store in Montreal.

Admittedly, I took a much-needed blogging break. I was/am lazy. That's my only excuse. However, I return with the story of a lifetime - at least I think it is!

For a change, I have a string of fancy events that required major outfit calculations. Mostly heavy accessorizing, because my closet is FULL of cute/fun/fancy wear. So, in my outfit conceptualization - yes, that's right, I make outfit CONCEPTS before execution - I decided that for event #1, an outdoor engagement party, I would wear my beloved Betsey Johnson polka dotted tulle skirt, a loose silky camisole and a chunky necklace. I figured I'd pick up a new necklace - or earrings or whatever - at one of two fun places: Aqua Skye or Betsey Johnson.

Aqua Skye was an easy store to get in and out of. The salesgirls, though helpful, felt it necessary to only show me merchandise OVER $300 - WAY beyond my budget, thank you very much - and the more "reasonably" priced jewelry was STILL too expensive and I honestly couldn't see myself wearing anything. Hit or miss, that Aqua Skye.

Enter Betsey Johnson.

Allow me to preface by saying that this store can DO NO WRONG. I love the cupcake dresses, I love the kitsch, I LOVE the bows and tulle and polka dots. Betsey Johnson was made for me. Truth be told, the vast majority of my Betsey merchandise hails from Winners, not the flagship. Whatever - a deal's a deal! Also, I am QUEEN of talking it up with salespeople. I LOVE a good store-merch conversation. I know my stuff - mostly, or I heavily pretend like I do - and I love a good chitchat. The Betsey staff are usually overly aggressive and friendly, yet tolerable. That being said, I was NOT prepared for this.

Within an instant of walking into the empty-except-for-two-clerks store, the female clerk RAN UP TO ME and shoved a purse in my face, shrieking "OH MY GOD ISN'T THIS THE CUTEST PURSE EVER? WE JUST GOT IT IN ISN'T IT CUTE????"

To which, I was confused, but appeased her and told her it was very nice (it was okay at best).

I then sauntered to the sales racks - that's where a recessionista fashionista goes first! - and the clerk FOLLOWED ME and exclaimed, "JUST SO YOU KNOW WE HAVE MORE SIZES IN THE BACK AND THESE TWO RACKS ARE THE SALES RACKS!!!!"

Well, duh. It's not the first time I've set foot into your store.

I figured I'd been aloof enough to keep her away. I wasn't. Because I was in the shopping zone, and because I was just plain trying to ignore her, I didn't pay attention when she said "SO, DO YOU HAVE PLANS FOR THIS WEEKEND??"

I turned around, and saw her standing about an inch away from my nose. The following is exact verbatum of the conversation that ensued:

"Umm, are you talking to me???"

"YA!! SO ARE YOU GOING OUT THIS WEEKEND??"

"I think so."

"WHERE TO? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE YOU GOING TO GO TO A BEACH? ARE YOU GOING TO SIT BY THE POOL? ARE YOU GOING TO GO TAN AND ENJOY THE SUMMER HEAT????"

"I don't know."

To which, I thought she MAY have gotten the hint. I honestly had originally thought she was talking to the other salesperson. Why would this LUNATIC engage me in heavy conversation, when I was clearly ignoring her?

I continued on my way around the store, casually looking at what was new. I literally ran my fingers over this dress - NO I'M NOT CRAZY AND 16 AND I WAS NOT GOING TO EVEN TRY IT ON, I WAS JUST CURIOUS ABOUT THE BOW (which is fully detachable and cute, FYI) - and the NUTCASE barked across the store,

"OH MY G-D THAT'S THE CUTEST DRESS EVER IT'S SO CUTE OH MY G-D YOU SHOULD TOTALLY TRY IT ON IT WOULD LOOK SO AWESOME ON YOU OH MY G-D IT'S SO CUTE!!!!!"

I swear I'm not exaggerating.

And with that, I ran - not walked - out of the store faster than you can say CREEP.

I actually never got to look at their jewelry case.

NEW BLOG - Have YOU Visited Yet?

http://www.craftwithjackie.com

That's my new blog - Craft with Jackie.

Bookmark that.
Go visit.

Signs From Beyond

Sometimes, I think there are alternate life forms living in my cave of a room.

I've been anxiously prepping my life for my new blog launch. This process has taken to including reading craft magazines (like actual print magazines - so 4 years ago, right?), craft blogs, fashion blogs (okay, I STILL want to go shopping - truth: I am hastily trying to locate a super cute pair of open-toe ankle booties with less than a 4 inch heel under $100 - help please?), buying TONS of funny craft supplies, going through all of my existing craft supplies, taking inventory of weird items to be potentially recycled, and, of course, the most important: cleaning off my general mess of a desk to have a good crafting-working-writing surface.

Here's some background information. I have an awesome IKEA desk with a huuuge surface and 4 drawers underneath that faces my window. Most people who've visited my room wouldn't notice my desk at first glance - it's been conveniently hidden under stacks of books, DVDs, CDs (yes - I sometimes still use those), pens, markers, makeup, jewelry, pictures and god only knows what else. The drawers have become a hiding spot for anything I don't feel like dealing with - old Visa bills, old midterms, random stationery, old birthday cards, that sort of stuff. If I said I could give you an exact inventory of the 4 drawers, I'd be viciously lying through my teeth. My desk hasn't been used for anything of value - other than a super large vanity when it's makeup application time - in a solid year - MINIMUM. I also have this super great desk lamp attached to the side of the desk that gives awesome light - except the light bulb burnt out ages ago and I was wayyy too lazy to change it... or so I thought.

A few days ago - without any warning - I tackled cleaning my desk. Threw out tons of garbage, put all my cosmetics in one place, all my accessories into a bag and organized my "important" paperwork. Really cleaned off my surface. I found some really quirky things that I forgot I had - typical. While I was moving things left-and-right and tidying up, out of nowhere, my lamp - that I was convinced was dead - turned on.

Really - I didn't change or touch wiring, and trust me, nobody in my house was ambitious enough to venture into my cavern and change the bulb for me. Remember my chandelier? My point exactly. (I was going to hyperlink this, but I can't find my chandelier blog posts. Too bad.)

My TEMPERAMENTAL lamp only decided to work once my desk was clean. WELL, UP YOURS, LAMP!

Why am I not shocked? My lamp is in cahoots with my mother. Endlessly wishing I'd just CLEAN OFF MY DESK.

Should Be Sleeping.. BUT

I was just catching up on some OTHER blogs that I happen to really enjoy, like this one and this one. Notice how they BOTH have "shoes" in their title? Convenient? Theme reading? Yes, I think so.

ANYWAYS.

Shop*Girl had posted this delicious entry about Google Analytics, everyone's best pal, and how she was checking out which keywords people are googling to land up on her site. She had a really hilarious list. Let's see how mine is! Here's a sampling:

• "apple baba" calorie - oh please, like I have ANY nutritional information here. I know which posts this goes with though. I had an apple baba obsession issue a while back. My jeans thank me for getting over that phase.
• a forgotten novel about the life changing day in the life of a woman - really?? And you landed on MY blog? Okay!
• all-my-hair cut-my-hair - well, sure because I hacked off about 6+ inches of long lustrous hair in favor of a cute asymmetrical bob. Those keywords are almost a testament to how my former hairdresser must feel about me.
• bandage dress ottawa - Christ, is this because all I do is dream of owning a Herve Leger bandage dress while living in Ottawa? MY SECRET WISH HAS BEEN REVEALED!
• captain annoying - AND YOU LANDED ON MY BLOG? SHAME ON YOU.
• chat lolz - I am debating testing this one out.
• fred penner pedophile & fred penner accused - ?!!? REALLY?
• if you spend a night with such kittens you may say you are the luckiest guy in the world - well, yes. That is certainly true.
• is my friend clairvoyant? - truth: some people -OKAY ONE PERSON- thinks I have clairvoyant tendencies.
• shoplifting in aritzia - THIS SHOULD NEVER BE ASSOCIATED WITH MY BLOG! I love aritzia and I always ALWAYS pay full price.
• willy wonka sarcasm - I am so confused, but I happen to love chocolate, so this is okay, I guess.

I'd have to say 90% of the keywords involved in my stats are related to Montreal stores I've mentioned and/or shop at. Not shocking. These weirdo ones above? NOT A SINGLE CLUE.

If you happen to use Google Analytics, I STRONGLY urge you to check out your list. Too funny!

XOXO

News Flash OR Current Happenings, As Told By The Ditz

Oh, HELLO Kittens!

Last post, 2 weeks ago, did not offer much in the news department, but I think I can sum up life in a couple of bullet darts.

• As much as I love poking fun at the looming RECESSION, this Ditz became a VICTIM of the recession 2 Fridays ago. I was casually laid off of my lazy-ass good-for-nothing job. Truth: not so upset. I was running out of actual work to do, the curse of being the cutest temp on the face of the earth, and once they cut the internet on all our computers, I knew my days were numbered. Clearly, working as a low-paid slave wasn't exactly my career path. Oh well, onto NEW exciting ventures, which leads to...
• I keep alluding to new exciting things going on with my blog, but I never really specified. Why? Because up until a month ago or so, I didn't actually KNOW what those changes would be. I knew I had to buy my own domain and expand my blog, but I also knew that I needed to rethink my blog concept. No offense to myself and/or my life, but I wasn't keen on spending money for a blog about myself.
• That brings me to this...
• Up and running in approximately 2 weeks, my new blog, Craft With Jackie will be launching. I'll be posting 2 exciting crafts per week and taking craft requests, ideas and the like from YOU! You can send craft or any DIY idea to jackie@craftwithjackie.com. I've got dozens of amazing crafts already planned, and I'm requests for guest crafting - that list is getting long!
• That being said, I'm going to try to keep AnecDitz going. I'll still post amazing sales and great shopping, but the "Ditz is wearing this today" is PROBABLY going to stop! Sorry!

I'm really excited and thrilled to be taking a new step with this new blog and I hope you all come visit!

http://www.craftwithjackie.com

XOXO

MIA? Hardly!!!

I bet you're thinking, "OH, THAT LAZY DITZ. SHE DOESN'T POST ANYMORE. WHO DOES SHE THINK SHE IS? BRITNEY SPEARS?"

Well, YOU'RE ONLY HALF WRONG.

I sometimes think I'm Britney. I mostly think I'm a princess. Same difference!


Well, faithful kittens, here's what's going down:

I haven't COMPLETELY abandoned The AnecDitz. Moving forward, into 2009, I've finally decided to upgrade to my own page and domain - NOT hosted by Blogger - and take a leap into the real web-world. Along with the new domain and page, I'll be having a teensy bit of a new concept, too! I don't want to spoil surprises, yet, but the AnecDitz and my self-gratifying pictures of myself are coming to a slight halt.

I haven't wanted to post anything lately, because all I want to post about is the NEW concept and I'm a bit too excited and I'm afraid I'll "waste" my new material here.

I hope you'll all follow me to my new domain, which I'll announce once it's been paid for.

I'm gearing up for the MARVELOUS journey up ahead - and I can't wait to bring you all along for the ride!

XOXO

New Series: Theme Outfits

OR Signs I Need a "Real" Hobby.


I'd like to say that this whole concept of "Themed Outfits" was a mistake. It KIND OF was. It started two weeks ago, when I wore my feathered earrings, cute collegiate cardigan and "suede" moccasin boots all on the same day. I called it "Pocahontas Goes To College".


The next day, I wore a dress with pockets and black tights that bunched around my ankles (not because I'm trendy, but because I hadn't pulled up my tights properly and they were too long). While I was eating my breakfast of Frosted Flakes with milk and apple juice, I realized that day's theme was "Ditz is 25 Going On 6".


A couple of days later, I decided it was time to debut my new and beloved Peacock feathered headband. I wore it with a peacock blue top and matching cardigan. Yes. You guessed right. That day was "Ditz The Magical Live Peacock".


Last week, I did a bit of "Susie Homemaker" in a full skirt and giant fake pearls.


Today, in honor of the US Presidential Inauguration - no, actually, there's no real connection - I bring you a new themed outfit: Sorority Girl.

In my Sorority, we support Hazing. Fully.

Top Worker Bee loves office photoshoots almost as much as she loves Ping Asian Cuisine.

BEST. NEWS. EVER.

CHRIST I CAN'T FIND THE ARTICLE ONLINE YET - BUT MARK MY WORDS, WHEN I DO, IT'S BEING LINKED AS PROOF.


Forever 21 is FINALLY and ACTUALLY coming to Montreal and is taking over and/or opening inside the Ailes Complex downtown.

3 CHEERS FOR TRENDY CHEAP CUTE CLOTHES!


UPDATE: Found it. Read this for proof.
Fantastic.

I Kick Ass.

I'm a better shopper than you.

Here's why:

In a magical November post, I'd mentioned briefly how I'd bought a Juicy silk printed skirt. I didn't go into MAJOR detail about it, but what you don't know is that I'd spent COUNTLESS hours trying to find a picture of it online. UNSUCCESSFULLY.


And I couldn't understand why. I figured it was SUPER OLD, like 12 seasons ago, and I dropped the search and moved onto just wearing it.

Turns out, it's not a super old skirt. It's not last season, it's not last year. It's ACTUALLY SPRING 2009.

What does this mean? I HAD A NEW SKIRT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE.

What it REALLY means is that if you ever see one-of-a-kind Juicy Couture items at that Juicy outlet, SNAP THEM UP FAST, because they're samples of FUTURE SEASONS!!

The real punch line, is that I paid $70 for it. It retails now for $228 USD.

I love life.

Update: I saw it selling for $250 Canadian. I am the best.

No, This Wasn't Planned.

Okay, well, SORT OF.

SOMEONE at my office is guilty of CONSTANTLY using/STEALING my DR. MOODREAMY from Graze Moonatomy mug.

Exhibit A: My mug.

(This is stock footage. My actual mug is faded from too much DISHWASHER lovin' AND IS MIA.)

So, today, when I decided I NEEDED a toasty beverage that requires MUG USE, I had to find a substitute. Normally, I snatch TWB's mug (it has a VINTAGE picture of her and her best pal at like 7 years old on it. TWB wears a nice outfit on it), but that was ALSO MIA. I had to - thankfully - resort to using one of the extra mugs floating around. Lucky for me, one of the other friendly worker bees bought some kitschy fun mugs for us to use.

Exhibit B: Ditz and replacement mug.

Like I said, this wasn't TOTALLY planned. It was just convenient.

And totally cute.

Special thanks - as usual - to my special office photographer, Top Worker Bee and her beloved iPhone.

WHO DOES SHE THINK SHE IS?

ME?!!

Go here: http://www.craftandhobby.org/cgi-bin/pressrelease.cgi?func=ShowHobbyRelease&releaseid=280

Or, just read this part:

Paris Hilton, internationally recognized model, singer, author, and entrepreneur will be available on Sunday, January 25, 2009 from 2:00 - 3:00 pm in the Wooky Entertainment booth #2500, to unveil Paris Hilton, the Creative Collection™ a multi-faceted line of fashion crafting kits from some of the most popular craft segments including scrapbooking, jewelry making and fabric embellishment. Paris will be on hand for photos and signing autographs

Seriously, why wasn't I born Paris Hilton? I LOVE CRAFTS! I would give up my extra long second toe - ON BOTH FEET - to be able to have a line of craft kits.

All grumpies and bitterness aside, I actually do think this is an amazing idea. No, not ME having craft kits (no, that's a good idea too), but Paris stamping her name and image on craft kits. In this digital age where kids are losing the knack of hand-eye coordination because they're busy playing video games (OKAY, FINE I PLAY VIDEO GAMES TOO), it's nice to see craft-promotion.

Just this week at my place of work, Top Worker Bee, one of the friendly IT guys and myself were discussing how knitting and gingerbread house building are slowly becoming a lost art. TWB got a lovely hand-knit hat and scarf- complete with pockets- over the holidays from her man's grandmother, and we were marvelling at how kids these days aren't picking up on knitting and/or general handicrafts. IT guy told us how he "forced" his eldest daughter - now 18 - to sit with her grandmother and learn how to make a gingerbread house, because it'll soon be her responsibility and it's a lost art. And you know what? He's right. How many of you know how to knit? How many of you can actually MAKE something useful? I'm not saying popsicle stick boxes, because heck, we ALL can do that. I'm talking real handicrafts. Useful stuff.

It's a recession, y'all. Why go out and spend a fortune on useless presents for people, when you can recycle-cycle and MAKE things?

And no, I don't know how to knit either.

Cooooooupon Time

I will not steal YOUR deals! LOLcat might.

I posted this for anyone who is either a. Canadian or b. not on my general mailing lists.

Here's how it works: Go to http://beautytubes.ca and sign up for their services or whatever it is. When they ask for a referring code, put in Z4WB and POOF. Coupon for $5 off this DELICIOUS mascara.

YAY COOOOOOUPONS.

"I'm MARVELOUS"

Yes, yes you are.

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1559540640/bclid1557820246/bctid6551042001

Go investigate that. Absolutely lovely.

As if we didn't already think Lady GaGa was born with talent shining out of her rear end, this just seals the deal.

...Anybody know where I can get a hairbow out of hair like hers?

I don't want to go back to work today.

VACATION FOREVER!!