And on a SHOPPING Note...

I admittedly enjoy online shopping more than I should. It's just easy, you know? Click, buy, mail, package, FUN!! I have memberships at all the big online flash sale shops: Gilt/Fuse, Hautelook, RueLaLa (even though they don't ship to Canada, I like to look!!), Beyond the Rack. When I decided to curb my spending (unemployment does that to you), I deactivated all daily/weekly/monthly emails from all of the above sites, except BTR - they're Canadian, I couldn't - to resist temptation. The less I see, the less I buy, right?

Wrong.

I still totally order occasionally from BTR. I have some goodies from La Fee Verte hopefully coming next week. I had $10 credit AND they were selling bustiers for $22. That's beyond cheaper than even the plainest one at Victoria's Secret OR La Senza. AND I have a La Senza discount card. Still a better deal.

BTR is disappointing on most days. A J Brand denim sale sounds amazing, but it'll have 4 pairs of jeans - and priced at $129+. Not awesome, BTR. They had a "Designer Handbag Clearance". Mega SNORE. Miu Miu bags over $600. Ancient Balenciaga bags over $1000. Clearance? ON WHAT PLANET?!

I visited Hautelook 2 days ago, for the first time in months, just to have a peek at what I've been missing. THEY had a "Designer Handbag Clearance". (Click images to enlarge and to induce indigestion)

I visited it probably 12 hours too late. While I may NOT be in the market for a new Fendi purse, had I logged into Hautelook on time, I'd probably be having a GLORIOUS photoshoot involving me smooching a brand-spanking-new Fendi bag.

I guess it's all for the best, right? A Fendi would take my love away from every other materialistic/designer thing I own. My smooches should be reserved for my Prince.

WHO AM I KIDDING?

I'VE BEEN KICKING MYSELF IN THE SHINS EVER SINCE I SAW WHAT I'D MISSED.

And yes. Those ARE the real prices. $200 range. NOT. FAIR.

I Know How I Feel About Fakes...

But really, I'm willing to cave.

We all saw the SATC movie. We all fell in love with Manolo Blahnik's "Something Blue". With a price tag of $945 USD, I cannot rationalize that purchase EVER. I'd sell all my purses in exchange for these. Forget that they were featured in the movie - I couldn't care less. It's that cobalt blue satin color that reeled me in. The classic shape. The TO-DIE-FOR jeweled buckle.

$945 is still WAY over budget, especially when shoe budget is between $5 and $25 these days. NOT MUCH I CAN BUY WITH THAT.

And, despite being fervently morally opposed to anything NOT real, I came across these guys and have signed up for an email notification for when my size will be available. IF EVER.

These are the real Something Blues:Excuse me while I mop up my drool puddle.

And these self-loathing Martinez Valero "Zenith" pumps are the knock-offs:

At $159.99 USD, these guys aren't such a bargoon either, but I'm plenty positive that blowing 2 bills on shoes is SLIGHTLY more reasonable than blowing close to 10 bills on the real ones.


Now, before ANYONE jumps down my throat for promoting fakes, let's play a round of clarifications:

• I am NOT suggesting anyone purchase shoes from those "cheap" Louboutin/Manolo sites - those are fully fake and for LOSERS.
• These pumps are really seasonal and trendy. By the time the next SATC movie comes out, there'll be a new Manolo endorsement.
• I own ONE pair of actual Manolos, so DON'T JUDGE ME for wanting these.
• Nobody should pay full price for things featured in a movie.

And speaking of shoesies, I ventured into Aldo for the first time in ages [lies, I bought awesome MBMJ-inspired lace-up booties over the summer] and they have AWESOME shoes in. Like even better for seasonal trends than Steve Madden, when we all know that SM knocks off EVERY designer shoe on the planet. Aldo, while they knock off EVERYTHING too - for some odd reason - seems to have hit the fall shoe nail on the head with great shoes. I was heavily impressed.

http://www.aldoshoes.com/ca-eng/women/boots/tall-boots/75426698-velardi/97 those guys? AWESOME. Over the knee AND heeled AND platformed. Delicious. You can just call me Vivian.

http://www.aldoshoes.com/ca-eng/women/pumps/almond-toe/76343755-fawson/12 the grey and taupe are suede. I used all my self-restraint and didn't even TRY these on, for fear I'd leave with them. Too yummy!!!

Of course, since shoesies that are YUMMY and cute and exciting aren't in this week's budget, I settled my shopping craving at Old Navy. With this dress. At $20 CAD + tax, I couldn't resist. I grabbed it in the grey/black combo. Adorable central!!! Now if I only had some beautifully fabulous thigh-high boots to go with it...

Forever 21 Opens In Town - WHOOPIE DOO

I've only been buzzing about this for MINIMUM ONE YEAR.

The opening came and went two weeks ago, and, in an effort to avoid mobs of 14 year old girls in skinny jeans and heavy eyeliner, I waited until today to make my visit.

Umm, two words: DISAPPOINTMENT and SNORE.

I made the mistake of really REALLY hyping myself up. I scoured the Canadian website [FYI: we Canadians don't get even CLOSE to all the fab stock the U.S. gets, see our website for proof] and made myself like 7 mock-up shopping carts of items I wanted to find and possibly try on/buy. I was reasonable - 3 cardigans, 1 skirt, 1 jumper, a belt and 2 head-accessories. It didn't even cross my mind once that I MAY need a back-up plan - I was looking ideally for some new Jew-Holiday outfits AND some fun wardrobe "essentials". Let's talk about how it was.

Here's the good: I took my sister on a fantastic bonding afternoon of chaotic shopping. Forever 21 has 2 floors of clothes. The upstairs has "fancy" clothes - i.e. the trashy party dresses, endless tutu-style miniskirts, sequins galore. The main floor has everything else. Tons of twelve-by-twelve. Piles of jewelry.

Here's the bad: ON AN EARLY FRIDAY AFTERNOON, WHEN KIDS SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL, THE STORE WAS MOBBED BY TEENAGE "HIPSTERS". Not a single item from my "wish list" was found. 7492 different styles of PLAID SHIRTS [FYI - I am not so into that whole look, yet]. Twelve-by-twelve was TAPPED OUT. Sizes? TAPPED OUT. Jewelry? TAPPED OUT. Belts? LIKE 4 STYLES TOTAL. Oh, did I mention about 50 different varieties of LEGGINGS? 2 FULL sections of THIS loser dress IN EVERY COLOR [it's okay for summer time, and I get its purpose, but it's September and it's already chilly and this dress was STILL FULL PRICE]. Packed dressing rooms. Oh, and NOTHING FROM MY WISH LIST. NOT EVEN THE BELT.

What did I actually end up getting?
This stupid headband, when I really wanted this one.
This necklace - which is admittedly pretty fun, who doesn't love feathers?
A necklace I can't find on either website - faux pearls with big metal flower things - it's cute.
And a huge colorful jeweled cuff bracelet that hurts to put on and hurts to take off... when I really wanted this one.

While I was waiting in line to pay, there were two MAYBE 18 year old French-Canadian girls behind me yapping about getting wasted all weekend. SNORE. Funny part was that they kept making fun of bib necklaces and calling them UGLY and HORRIBLE. IRONY - THOSE ARE SO TRENDY AND HOT AND COOL for fall. Those two morons will be wearing the Urban Behavior knockoffs next fall. They were also saying how once the hype dies down, F21 will be empty. Yeah, right. F21 is NEVER empty.

It was a GIGANTIC disappointment. I'm not even posting links of the things I WANTED that I could not find. Too sad.

Truthfully, one of the surprisingly friendly workers (most were obnoxious and ignored me) told me new stock comes in Mondays/Tuesdays. She also told me that ordering online is a breeze and it comes in 2-3 days. SHOULD'VE TOLD ME THAT LAST WEEK.

As soon as I'm a little more flush (Beyond The Rack.com owns my soul right now), I will probably order those cardigans... along with everything else I missed!!!

Over-Enthusiastic Salesgirl = TRAUMA

OR
Why I am cautiously avoiding the ONLY Betsey Johnson store in Montreal.

Admittedly, I took a much-needed blogging break. I was/am lazy. That's my only excuse. However, I return with the story of a lifetime - at least I think it is!

For a change, I have a string of fancy events that required major outfit calculations. Mostly heavy accessorizing, because my closet is FULL of cute/fun/fancy wear. So, in my outfit conceptualization - yes, that's right, I make outfit CONCEPTS before execution - I decided that for event #1, an outdoor engagement party, I would wear my beloved Betsey Johnson polka dotted tulle skirt, a loose silky camisole and a chunky necklace. I figured I'd pick up a new necklace - or earrings or whatever - at one of two fun places: Aqua Skye or Betsey Johnson.

Aqua Skye was an easy store to get in and out of. The salesgirls, though helpful, felt it necessary to only show me merchandise OVER $300 - WAY beyond my budget, thank you very much - and the more "reasonably" priced jewelry was STILL too expensive and I honestly couldn't see myself wearing anything. Hit or miss, that Aqua Skye.

Enter Betsey Johnson.

Allow me to preface by saying that this store can DO NO WRONG. I love the cupcake dresses, I love the kitsch, I LOVE the bows and tulle and polka dots. Betsey Johnson was made for me. Truth be told, the vast majority of my Betsey merchandise hails from Winners, not the flagship. Whatever - a deal's a deal! Also, I am QUEEN of talking it up with salespeople. I LOVE a good store-merch conversation. I know my stuff - mostly, or I heavily pretend like I do - and I love a good chitchat. The Betsey staff are usually overly aggressive and friendly, yet tolerable. That being said, I was NOT prepared for this.

Within an instant of walking into the empty-except-for-two-clerks store, the female clerk RAN UP TO ME and shoved a purse in my face, shrieking "OH MY GOD ISN'T THIS THE CUTEST PURSE EVER? WE JUST GOT IT IN ISN'T IT CUTE????"

To which, I was confused, but appeased her and told her it was very nice (it was okay at best).

I then sauntered to the sales racks - that's where a recessionista fashionista goes first! - and the clerk FOLLOWED ME and exclaimed, "JUST SO YOU KNOW WE HAVE MORE SIZES IN THE BACK AND THESE TWO RACKS ARE THE SALES RACKS!!!!"

Well, duh. It's not the first time I've set foot into your store.

I figured I'd been aloof enough to keep her away. I wasn't. Because I was in the shopping zone, and because I was just plain trying to ignore her, I didn't pay attention when she said "SO, DO YOU HAVE PLANS FOR THIS WEEKEND??"

I turned around, and saw her standing about an inch away from my nose. The following is exact verbatum of the conversation that ensued:

"Umm, are you talking to me???"

"YA!! SO ARE YOU GOING OUT THIS WEEKEND??"

"I think so."

"WHERE TO? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE YOU GOING TO GO TO A BEACH? ARE YOU GOING TO SIT BY THE POOL? ARE YOU GOING TO GO TAN AND ENJOY THE SUMMER HEAT????"

"I don't know."

To which, I thought she MAY have gotten the hint. I honestly had originally thought she was talking to the other salesperson. Why would this LUNATIC engage me in heavy conversation, when I was clearly ignoring her?

I continued on my way around the store, casually looking at what was new. I literally ran my fingers over this dress - NO I'M NOT CRAZY AND 16 AND I WAS NOT GOING TO EVEN TRY IT ON, I WAS JUST CURIOUS ABOUT THE BOW (which is fully detachable and cute, FYI) - and the NUTCASE barked across the store,

"OH MY G-D THAT'S THE CUTEST DRESS EVER IT'S SO CUTE OH MY G-D YOU SHOULD TOTALLY TRY IT ON IT WOULD LOOK SO AWESOME ON YOU OH MY G-D IT'S SO CUTE!!!!!"

I swear I'm not exaggerating.

And with that, I ran - not walked - out of the store faster than you can say CREEP.

I actually never got to look at their jewelry case.

BEST. NEWS. EVER.

CHRIST I CAN'T FIND THE ARTICLE ONLINE YET - BUT MARK MY WORDS, WHEN I DO, IT'S BEING LINKED AS PROOF.


Forever 21 is FINALLY and ACTUALLY coming to Montreal and is taking over and/or opening inside the Ailes Complex downtown.

3 CHEERS FOR TRENDY CHEAP CUTE CLOTHES!


UPDATE: Found it. Read this for proof.
Fantastic.

I Kick Ass.

I'm a better shopper than you.

Here's why:

In a magical November post, I'd mentioned briefly how I'd bought a Juicy silk printed skirt. I didn't go into MAJOR detail about it, but what you don't know is that I'd spent COUNTLESS hours trying to find a picture of it online. UNSUCCESSFULLY.


And I couldn't understand why. I figured it was SUPER OLD, like 12 seasons ago, and I dropped the search and moved onto just wearing it.

Turns out, it's not a super old skirt. It's not last season, it's not last year. It's ACTUALLY SPRING 2009.

What does this mean? I HAD A NEW SKIRT BEFORE ANYONE ELSE.

What it REALLY means is that if you ever see one-of-a-kind Juicy Couture items at that Juicy outlet, SNAP THEM UP FAST, because they're samples of FUTURE SEASONS!!

The real punch line, is that I paid $70 for it. It retails now for $228 USD.

I love life.

Update: I saw it selling for $250 Canadian. I am the best.

Lord, Help Me Please

Those of you who follow my Tweets and/or Facebook status updates and/or know my habits and/or my schedule know that tonight is my last night of happy family vacation. I opted to ENJOY my holiday, as opposed to spending my time INDOORS blogging. Sorry. Tanning was HIGH PRIORITY.

Right now, I'm working really hard/hardly working on cramming a week's worth of Forever XXI/21 & Coach outlet shopping into my ONE TEENSY SUITCASE.

It's not going so well.

Photographic evidence:

Exhibit A: Overstuffed suitcase filled with trendy new goodies. Pile of items that still need to go in.

Exhibit B: Shopping bags of items yet to be packed.



Exhibit C: Assorted items on bed that need to be packed. Of note: Ditz loves animal print, namely, leopard; Ditz finally found herself a PEACOCK feathered accessory; Ditz loves reading/is literate; Ditz loves purses (3 on bed, 2+ on floor); Ditz loves stuffed giraffes.



Exhibit D: Community of shoes anxiously awaiting their spot in the suitcase. Patient and beloved Marc Jacobs mouse flats are excited to go home, while charming Louboutins foster anger towards Ditz for being brought and NOT WORN ONCE. [Betsey Johnson slides are indifferent.]

Truth be told, there is a HIGH chance that these shoes aren't coming home with me tomorrow. From the looks of my already heavy bag, there is NO WAY on this planet that they'll fit into my bag. WHAT WAS I THINKING, PACKING 6 PAIRS OF SHOES FOR A 7 DAY TRIP?! WHO DO I THINK I AM, IMELDA MARCOS? [The correct answer here is yes.]

Let us join forces in a small prayer right now:

Dear Lord Upstairs,

Please help me stuff all of my new goodies into my little suitcase. I overpacked, and I am aware that I did NOT need 12 assorted tops and 8 pairs of shorts for such a brief trip. I am also aware that I wore my new white denim shorts at least 3 times, when I could've worn other things. Please don't punish me now. Just figure out a way to get all of my stuff in one bag that doesn't pop.

In addition, I would also greatly appreciate if my flight wasn't delayed tomorrow and that I have an easy time getting through customs. It would be a great shame if they rip apart my bag and make me show them all the lovely things I purchased this week. Wait. No, I love showcasing my new stuff.

Please just make tonight and tomorrow bearable and easy! I WILL BE FOREVER HAPPY!

With plenty of love,
Your Favorite Ditz.

FIND ME

Are you a female? Do you moderately enjoy shopping and/or a good deal?

FIND ME THIS WEEK.

Classmate Kitten passed me a stack [that she's so kindly replenishing tonight] of 35% off regular/15% off sale price for La Vie en Rose/Aqua stores. For this week and this week only.

Do you want a coupon? COME FIND ME.

AND JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OVER..

It's not.

MORE SAMPLE SALES.

Don't you just LOVE this city? Click on the image for complete information. AREN'T I FANCY NOW?

[Edit: I got the flier!]

3 CHEERS FOR CONSUMERISM!

Visa, It's Back to Witness Protection For You.

OK. SERIOUSLY.

I have a zillion better things to talk about but before I even get REMOTELY started, let's talk about the anxiety attack I had yesterday afternoon, between 1:30 p.m. and 2:45 p.m.

There were rumors that this gem wasn't really opening. I feared HARDCORE that it was an urban legend and that the emails they were sending me WEREN'T REAL.

THANK GOD I WAS WRONG.

The folks who bring us the elusive Juicy sample sale ACTUALLY opened up an outlet store. I naturally went on opening day. I was overwhelmed for a solid 30 minutes. IT'S THE BEST STORE IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.

Let's do a walkaround of what this haven has:

• A wall of DENIM. ALL SIZES.
• 1 gigantic table of Juicy track suits. EVERY COLOR IN THE GODDAMN RAINBOW. Terry, fleece, velour. THEY'RE ALL THERE. EVERY. SIZE.
• 1 gigantic table of 1-of-a-kind Juicy sample suits [majority size small- NOT PETITE, but small] - these are more novelty ones.
• 1 table of Ed Hardy and other novelty tshirts.
• 1 table of Vince cashmere and James Perse and other goodies.
• An area for trendy children's clothing.
• A large region of MEN'S stuff. [SEE? I sometimes care for the men!]
• All along one wall, dresses, sportswear, blouses, EVERYTHING.

I DID NOT KNOW WHERE TO START.

The wall of assorted hanged goodies is primarily last season overstock from Abe & Mary's. Like all those delicious cocktail dresses? HALF PRICE.

Prince? Let's go somewhere fancy. I WANT TO GET NEW PARTY DRESSES.

Kittens, this store is out of control. IN A GOOD WAY.

I know you're wondering what I left with. A black terry Juicy suit. Boring, I know. A teal CASHMERE Juicy suit. That's right. CASHMERE. A GLORIOUS Juicy silk printed full mini skirt.

That image is a SCREENCAP of the email they'd sent me. It has the address on it. RUN, DON'T WALK.

They seriously have the most enthusiastic staff I've ever encountered. I had not one, but TWO kittens helping me search for matching cashmere. TWO. AND they were SUPER NICE about it. "Oh, if we come across this color and you're still here, we'll hang onto it for you."

SURE, THEY JUST LOVE WHEN I SPEND MONEY.

Oh, and they're going to be getting in new shipments. Every week.

MORE SAMPLE SALEAGE.

This is probably the reason that our Lord upstairs put blogging into my hands. TO TELL EVERYONE WHEN/WHERE TO GET GOOD DEALS.

I truthfully have not gone to ANY this season. SORRY. NOT HAPPENING. I AM TOO POOR FOR THAT. I'm really just saving my pennies to surprise myself with a gigantic birthday present. For myself. From somewhere fancy.

So, without further ado, here's what I've got this week:

Ponyride Agency [home to Sweetees, Necessary Objects and a pile of other brands] is having a majority Ladieswear only sale. CASH ONLY.
225 Chabanel, suite 405 : Thursday, Nov. 6 & Friday, Nov. 7, 9 a.m. - 8 p.m.

Surplus Sunglasses [Tom Ford, Dior, Gucci, Ray Ban, Marc Jacobs & more] -> I went to this one last spring and bought two pairs of sunglasses. It's pretty great if you love sunglasses! They take ALL FORMS of payment!
5249 de la Savane/corner Decarie: Thursday, Nov. 13 & Friday, Nov. 14: 10 a.m. - 9 p.m. and Saturday, Nov. 15 & Sunday, Nov. 16: 12 p.m. - 5 p.m.

Nuage is outerwear. Coats. I've actually gone there before for coats. Click on the image for the information!

This one my mum sent me. Again, check the image for details. Canadian designers! Free Parking!

Go shop! YAY CONSUMERISM!

Another Sale - Hide Your Credit Cards

Marcelle/Annabelle Cosmetics Sale [HEY, I GOT PICTURES OF THE FLIER. I AM FANCY.]

Special thanks to Disaster Pet for passing this one along. Who knew he liked lip gloss that much?

[Note: click on the images to ENLARGE and read INFORMATION]

WHO'S LAUGHING NOW? ME, THAT'S WHO.

Pre-blog, I went on an excursion to Toronto, to visit my favorite Toronto Kitten. She conned me into buying THE most INAPPROPRIATE dress EVER. It's been worn EXACTLY ONCE, and that ONE time, it got LOOKS. Not your average "Oh, hey, that's a COOL DRESS" looks, or even "WELL, it's a little out there, but she is ADORABLE" looks. More like "CHRIST, THAT GIRL HAS SOME NERVE" looks.


You all laughed at me, and told me this was not a dress for a nice girl from Cote St Luc. BUT I KEPT IT ANYWAYS.

Words do not do this FROCK justice. But do you know what DOES do it justice? THIS.

No, your eyes do not deceive you. THAT'S A ZIPPER THAT RUNS FROM THE TOP TO THE BOTTOM. It fits like a Herve Leger bandage dress. Except it's not.

Guess what.

People Magazine's Style Watch in this week's issue (MADONNA AND GUY RITCHIE SPLIT: NO PRENUP, NO SOULS, NO MERCY!) features something interesting. ZIPPER DRESSES.

HAH.

SO. THERE. ONCE AGAIN, DITZ IS AHEAD OF SCHEDULE.

BAD NEWS - SAMPLE SALE RELATED

Shocker - the Juicy sale was canceled.

HOWEVER.

The company that "deals" with this sale CLAIMS they're just opening an ALL THE TIME outlet store.

SKEPTICAL DITZ DOESN'T BELIEVE THIS. Do you?